I try not to get political here, or in a lot of areas of my life. It’s not that I don’t have opinions–it’s that I’d prefer to find common ground. There is far too much that we allow to divide us, and I think that’s one of the biggest problems our society faces. All too often, we shun those whose opinions differ from our own.
But there are some exceptions.
Today, Mr. Sandwich and I are celebrating our ninth anniversary. I am so grateful for this man who loves and supports me. I appreciate the fact that we could mark our commitment to each other in front of friends and family. I am reassured that our relationship and our family have legal protections.
I think everyone ought to be able to have that.
Your house of worship doesn’t want to marry couples who are gay? They don’t have to. And no matter what the Supreme Court decides in either case it’s hearing on the subject this week, they won’t have to. But the reasons for and purposes of marriage have varied widely throughout history, and across social classes, so I don’t buy the argument that marriage has a specific and unchanging purpose.
And the argument that gay marriage undermines straight marriage? Let’s not even delve into the question of celebrity marriage rates, or the nationwide divorce rate. Those miss the point, which is this:
The only people who can undermine our marriage are Mr. Sandwich and me. No one else’s marriage affects ours. Not my brother’s to his wife; not Britney Spears’ or Elizabeth Taylor’s or Mickey Rooney’s to–between them–20 people; not our friend from the bus who went out of state to legally marry his husband several months ago. Whether strong or weak, those are their marriages–not ours.
Your house of worship can choose which people they will or will not marry based on any number of criteria; mine certainly did. But the government’s true interest in marriage is not based on love, or birth rates, or a specific vision of society. It is based on property rights and access.
If you love someone and spend your life with them, you should be able to get information about their medical care when they’re critically ill. You should be able to easily inherit. You should be able to say who you are and who you love and build a legal life together.
Mr. Sandwich I have had those rights for the past nine years. I want more people to have what we have.
