As they read off the nominees for Best Foreign Film:
Me: It’s going to be Tangerines. Or Wild Tales.
Mr. Sandwich: Oh?
Me: I know nothing about any of them. I’m just going based on names, like at a horse race.
Nicole Kidman: And the Oscar goes to Ida!
Mr. Sandwich: (pointing) You are WRONG!
Me: (shrugging) I’m often wrong at horse races, too.
On a more serious note, I get the point behind the #AskHerMore campaign. I do think that the work should be more of the focus for women, as it is for men.
But you know what? Those actresses didn’t accidentally fall into those designer gowns. They didn’t take a wrong turn and wind up on the Red Carpet. The gowns and the stupid questions are promotional tools for the actresses, the questioners (I don’t consider them reporters or journalists), the designers, and the event–and everyone’s been using them that way for years.
So if you want to change the dynamic, change it from multiple angles. Push people to #AskHerMore, by all means. But also forgo the gowns and the jewels and the shoes and the clutches. Because they’re going to stop asking “Who are you wearing?” if every time the answer turns out to be “David’s Bridal” or “J. Crew.”
I think this is going to work particularly well when everyone is prepared to say something of substance.*
*I agree that Patricia Arquette’s remarks backstage, after the ceremony, were problematic and at best poorly thought-out. But her overall point still is one worth discussing.